Lucky In Love
by omens
Summary: I want to be happy for her. Honestly, I do. It’s just hard knowing that somebody has taken my place in her heart. Part 3 of the Crellie series.


**Summary: **I want to be happy for her. Honestly, I do. It's just hard knowing that somebody has taken my place in her heart.

Part 3 of the Crellie series.

Season Six Spoilers

_**A/N: This one was hard for me to write, being the Eman freak that I am. But I had to, so yeah. And I would just like to say that this whole thing was Meagan's (moirariordan) doing for she gave me the idea. : )**_

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Have you ever looked at something you let go of and wondered what your life would have been like if you hadn't?

I've always been a firm believer in not looking back. Life happens, there's no point in regretting things that you can't change.

That doesn't mean I don't wonder though.

Yeah, I've done some really stupid stuff, things I even hate myself for.

I've hurt people. People like Ellie.

There was a time when I loved Ellie more than anything in the world and she assured me that she felt the same way. She was at the center of everything I wanted … but there was a part of me that knew it would never last. I think that's why I was able to let go.

But I never let go of Emma. She's inside of me. And that day I broke the hearts of each girl that I cared so much about, I said a silent prayer that Ellie would be able to find someone she could love that much.

Looking at her now, two years after she drove off with Jay and Emma, I can see that she has.

I want to be happy for her. Honestly, I do. It's just hard knowing that somebody has taken my place in her heart. Yeah, it's selfish, I get that. I'm with somebody I love and she deserves the same thing.

But Craig? I never saw that coming.

I remember way back when Ellie and I first got together. She couldn't stand him. He was the evil male that had pretty much destroyed her best friend and she hadn't been that crazy about him to begin with. And that dislike continued up to when I left Toronto.

Isn't it easy to see why it's so weird to see them all cuddled up together in a back corner at the Dot?

Emma and I had been to another in a long line of endless, torturous chick flicks that she insists on forcing me to sit through and went to grab a bite afterwards. I had just taken the first bite of my burger when the jingling of the overhead bell drew my attention.

I nearly choked on my food when I saw Ellie walk through the door hand in hand with Craig. And she was laughing like I had never heard her laugh before. Her entire face was lit up. She looked beautiful.

Craig, however, didn't look too good. He was pale and his skin had a sallow tint, but his eyes were shining as he gazed down at Ellie, grinning like he just couldn't help himself.

I catch Emma's eyes staring at me watching them. She's biting her lip nervously and her big eyes are full of anxiety. I squeeze her hand on the table reassuringly, not wanting her to think I'm still in love with Ellie.

Still … Ellie never looked like that when we together. We were happy, sure. But it was all pretend. We were just playing house and waiting for reality to catch up to us. When it did, we couldn't handle it and now here we are; me with Emma and Ellie with Craig.

How it should be.

I ran into Ellie in the hallway outside the bathrooms about an hour after she came in. She jumped a little when she saw me, whether out of the surprise of merely bumping into someone in the small space, or that it was me in particular.

"Sean, hey," she said, "I, uh, heard you were back in town."

"Yeah," Articulate, I know. What do I say to that? It's pretty obvious I'm back.

"I saw you with Emma," Ellie said, eyes fixed on the floor, "I didn't know you guys were …"

"I didn't know you and Craig were," I shot back.

Ellie had the grace to flush. She began picking at the already jagged black polish on her fingernails, a habit he remembered from when she still went to group therapy and snapped tightly wound rubber bands around her slim wrist continually.

"Are you happy?" I asked. Probably not the brightest thing I've ever done, but I had to know.

Even with her face turned toward the floor I could see her lips form into a smile. "Yeah," she whispered, "I am."

Then her face rose up, an almost radiant smile on her face. "I'm really happy."

"Craig doesn't look too good. Is he okay?"

Her face, already tender, became even softer. "He's going through a rough time, but he's getting better. I'm just glad I can help him."

I know she didn't mean that as a dig, but I have to admit that kinda stung. I loved Ellie, but I lost her because I wasn't able to let her in enough to help me when I needed it. There was something inside of me that needed to be healed and Ellie wasn't enough to do it.

"I'm glad you know, that you found someone you can be there for like that," I told her.

"Me too. I hope you and Ellie are really happy together," she replies.

A smile comes to my face that I couldn't fight if I tried. "We are."

She walks back toward the tables, and I called out to her. She turns, an apprehensive look on her face at the thought of what I might say.

"Craig's really lucky," I said.

She smiles, genuinely. I know now that there are no hard feelings anymore. I'm glad, we had something good once. Bitterness would only taint it.

Yeah, Emma's officially dragged me to too many sappy movies.

"No," Ellie says, "I'm the lucky one." Then she leaves, back to Craig that she obviously loves so much.

And she is lucky. She found someone to love who loves her back and that's a gift. She's really lucky. I walk out and my eyes fall on the blonde who's had my heart since I was thirteen years old and she smiles that smile of hers that she saves just for me. Ellie's lucky, but she's not the only one.

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_**A/N: I didn't intend for the Eman to be in this. It just kinda happened. Not sure I even like this, but it's Sean, so I had to do it. May redo later.**_


End file.
